Every holiday brings with it traditions. This time of year is full of joy, love, and sharing for normal people and arguing, jealousy, and disdain from my children. Every year I work to share my traditions with them. We read the same stories, sing and dance to the same Christmas songs, hide our stupid elf and of course, one of our favorite Christmas traditions: making candy. We make fondant and dip the little balls of sugary goodness into Dutch chocolate. HEAVENLY! Both kids were excited as they reminisced about the good old days and how they loved to dip chocolates. In reality, we have probably only done it a handful of times, but they will cherish those memories of happiness like the sweet little angels they periodically can be.
I decided that I was feeling like a normal human this year and I would be willing to spend some time with the kids to make memories, celebrate, and enjoy the season. Grandma sent us some of the yum yum chocolate from Utah, that with a little more effort I could have probably found it around here or order it from Amazon, but there is just something nostalgic about it coming from home. (Thanks Sue!)
With confidence I decided that this would be a great moment to capture a few fake pictures of happiness, like we all do. This way my kids will think they had a good childhood and they won’t remember how crappy it really was until they have to go to therapy when they are older. I feel like that is in someway an important rite of passage. No? Just me?
Taylor was out doing who knows what because: teenager. Kaiden was in a good mood and wanted to help me start making candy. We turned on some Christmas music and we started without her. I sent her Snap Chat pictures of our fun, because that is what all good moms do.
It started out well. My hopes were high. My soul was full of joy. I WAS READY! I asked Kaiden to measure the sugar. He complied and it was the simplest task I could think of where he felt like he was being helpful, but couldn’t possibly mess up our candy. I told him to measure out three cups. I did not eyeball his measurements because I kept seeing him dig into the sugar bag and I assumed that meant he did what I said. I also have terrible perception of anything related to measurement. I dumped the ingredients into my pot, stirred for about 25 minutes (my hands are still sore) and I poured the liquid sugar onto my stone as we begin the magic.
Unfortunately, the magic never really happened. Deep down, I knew it, but I kept my hopes high. I was using the power of positive thinking and was feeling pretty proud of myself for finding an activity where Kaiden could practice his OT skills while doing all of the hard work. No matter what we tried, no matter how much he kneaded the candy dough we ended up with a sticky soft mess. I couldn’t for the life of me figure out what happened, so we decided to set that one to the side and try again.
Again, I assigned Kaiden the task of measuring out the three cups of sugar. He looks at me and shouted, “THREE? I THOUGHT YOU SAID ONE!”. Aw, snap! No wonder that last batch wasn’t right. We chalked it up to making mistakes and we put our attention and effort into the next batch. Everything that I wished would have happened the first time around, happened this time. Perfection!
Finally, it was time to get the girl kid from town. We put our holiday joy on hold. Taylor was super excited to do the candy. I pictured this magical moment of family togetherness. The laughter. The heartwarming goodness of the season. When we got home, Kaiden was busy watching Netflix upstairs. He was probably watching Hallmark movies because that boy is perfect in every way and would never watch inappropriate stuff.
Tay and I started the next batch of candy centers. She was eager to do as much of the work as I would let her do. Again, we were full of holiday joy and everything was well with the world. This kind of happiness cannot be shared. Unfortunately, it almost always comes to an abrupt end as you realize that it literally can not be shared!
All of the giggling and fun must have been too much because at some point Kaiden decided to come downstairs. He wanted to show Taylor everything he had learned in his hour of candy making because he was now the candy master. I saw an opportunity to catch this small moment that I could later fake as a happy memory. I quietly moved into a corner, like a mom ninja, to get my photo. I could see that Taylor was getting irritated by his very presence and I tried to distract the boy by getting him to measure the sugar for our next batch of candy. She got mad at me for attempting to take a picture because she didn’t want any pictures with him in them. I took the picture anyway because, at this point, I really don’t care what she thinks. I am getting my picture and she will not kill my joy!
You would have thought that I had just ruined Taylor’s whole world. She flipped a switch and immediately got all crazy emotional teenager on us. Everything the boy did was pissing her off. I just let them fight it out for a minute. She starts screaming at him to leave because he had his turn and it was her turn to do it now. Apparently we can only do fun things one child at a time in this house. Kaiden was just trying to measure the damn sugar and at the same time tell her what to do to participate in the fun! I thought for sure the holiday feel goods would kick in at some point and she would take pity on the boy and maybe let him help. Well this little Grinch face girl took no pity. I even tried to guilt her into it. How dare you two not give me one moment of peace where I can take a happy picture!!! Can’t we just make candy and have fun? She would not be tricked. I got nothing but glaring eye face.
I tried to negotiate a truce between the two of them. Taylor suddenly decides that she is done and too tired to do anything else. She stormed off to her room announcing that she is tired and just can’t take anymore. Kaiden suddenly decides that he is bored and went back to his Hallmark Movie. Me? Well, I was left alone to finish the work and create my own holiday joy.
