Like a normal human, I decided that it would be a good thing to clean today. I’m sweeping the floor just minding my own business. As I walk in to sweep the bathroom floor, something captures my eye. A freaking lizard was cruising around my house. I know… I know… at least it wasn’t a…
Stranded…
Today I failed to check the toilet paper situation in the bathroom and ended up getting stranded. If I am being honest, it happens a lot. Someone forgot to change the roll when it ran out. That someone was me. This may be a TMI situation for some, so consider yourself warned. Anyhow, I yell to…
Do What You Are Asked…
Me: Tay- go sort out your recycle cans. Tay: I don’t want to. Me: It is your job because you need money for Hawaii.Tay: I don’t want to. Me: Give me your phone.Tay: (Hides it under her bum)Me: (puts phone into down time mode, blocks access to apps and facetime…oh no! No facetime?) Also me: You can have…
Life’s Lessons…
“WE” are reaching new levels of stupidity. “WE” are learning a lot. Let me be clear, I am not saying this kid is stupid. I AM saying his choices are stupid. You just wait! This evening, at a ridiculous night hour (no judging..we are night people), Kaiden decided to shower. I am getting annoyed by…
Late Night Gum Lesson…
Do you know what is fun? Picking gum out of your kids hair at 12:30 am. I won’t lie, I was too tired to get it out yesterday morning and he may have had gum slime down the side of his face,all day at school, that I didn’t notice until applying peanut butter to his…
The Hidden Lizard Pet….
Kaiden says: “Mom, I need to tell you something but I don’t want you to get mad.” Cue Kaiden Chronicles. Calmly I reply, “Okay. What did you do?” “You know that brown box in my room? I caught a baby lizard and I am keeping it in there.” “Ummmmm….no. Are you sure you didn’t lose…
Bathroom Standoff Part 2
Part 2 : I admitted to Tay that I posted our conversation on FB to which she responded in a teenagerly voice, “I’m not stupid mom. I may have had my earbuds in, but it’s not like there aren’t breaks in my music. I heard you and grandma talking. Anyway, I was texting Anna (her…
Bathroom Strike Part 1
Over Spring Break, I took the kids and my parents on a road trip up the Oregon Coast. Robbie had class in Portland that week, so we just planned on meeting him there on our way home. The first night at that hotel, I knew the sleeping arrangement was not going to work out for…
Is an Egg Just an Egg?
Just as I think things can’t get much stranger around here, I started helping Kaiden clean his room so my parents don’t think we live like this always. (Sorry mom and dad, it is generally a death trap walking into either kids room.) Yesterday Kaiden was being super shady about the side of his bed,…
A Little Bling…
Kaiden chronicles : It was very wisely suggested to me that we get Kaiden a watch to help with time management. Great idea! Well, obviously nothing goes as planned. My thought: oh he is going be very excited to go pick out is own cheap watch at the Walmarts. Our actual conversation: Me: Kaiden, what…